//Environment
Water Water Everywhere….
“Water, water, everywhere,
And all the boards did shrink;
Water, water, everywhere,
Nor any drop to drink.”
- The Rime of the Ancient Mariner
Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Dear Myopic, Idiot Neighbors,
Why yes, it is quite hot out, isn’t it? If you absolutely must open hydrants (thereby endangering the neighborhood by lowering water pressure when it might be needed to put out fires (or take showers for that matter), and basically treating clean water like it’s an infinite gift from the ass of baby Jesus and not a precious resource that must be cleaned and treated before it can be used again and therefore ought to be conserved), why the fuck can’t you share hydrants? Two on one block and one on each of the surrounding 3 blocks, flooding the streets. This always used to upset me when they showed clips of kids running through hydrant spray on Sesame Street and let me tell you, it’s far more upsetting to see it in person.
There are so many 311 calls about open hydrants that there is a special 311 Open Hydrant Complaint subset which directs callers to a 311 purgatory of waiting for an operator. I waited 11 minutes then gave up.
These people are not even using the hydrant caps that make a controlled spray, just completely removing the caps so the water gushes directly into the street. And then are unwilling/unable to close them again. YOU ARE IGNORANT AND WASTEFUL. I wish you lived in one of those countries where women have to walk for 3 hours to a water source and then lug 40 lbs of water back to their homes EVERY DAY.
Love,
Cari
Giving people access to safe, potable water.
Don’t Let the Bedbugs Bite
“If you know anything about bedbugs, you know they are ridiculously difficult to get rid of once you have an infestation.”
This story is a cute piece about something quite ugly: bedbugs are no joke people. I think last year we had a few and my co-worker recommended this primo spray called: Champion SprayOn® Multi-Purpose Insect & Lice Killer-10 oz. It normally costs $45 a bottle, but you can get it cheaper here. Item CHA5106.
This stuff is great. It doesn’t smell heavily of pesticide (or really of anything) so you can spray the shit out of your mattress and linens and not have to leave the room. If you know anything about bedbugs, you know they are ridiculously difficult to get rid of once you have an infestation. Like, way worse than fleas. Like people have to throw their furniture away.
For more info: bedbugs on Wikipedia, bedbugs in New York and bedbugs at Fox News (ha ha!).
ShareI Laugh Every Time I See A Humvee
7 MPG. Ha ha ha ha.
ShareEvolutionary
“If we look at the innumerable species of animals who exist or have existed, we see many, many failures.”
Evangelicals point to mutualism and say, See, proof of Intelligent Design. And it truly is a marvelous, even miraculous, thing.
But I firmly believe that things like mutualism is proof of evolution, that these beneficial associations exist because they have enabled these species to survive. Without the perpetuation of the species, there are no beneficial associations.
We can point to the shrimp and the goby as a success story, but if we look at the innumerable species of animals who exist or have existed, we see many, many failures. Unintelligent Design, if you will.
As with people, history is written by the winners.
ShareLess Blood, More Gore
Al Gore, winner of the popular vote in 2000, and focus of the incredibly important 2006 documentary “An Inconvenient Truth”, today was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize — along with the United Nations’ Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change — for their work to alert the world to the threat of global warming.
As such, if we’re channeling the current administration, we are now required to say that this is just further proof that the international community is a failure. They ruined the UN, now they’ve ruined the Nobel Peace Prize. Shit, it was bad enough when they gave the prize to Jimmy Carter, but now you’ve given it to a liberal who’s actually still a relevant political figure!? What’s next? An award for “Most Abortions Performed in 2007″!?!?
Sheesh! Calm down “Administration”. How about we just offer congratulations, and hope that this endorsement of Gore’s efforts will add to the already justifiably high profile of an important environmental issue.
Cheers!
Share
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//RECENT
Water Water Everywhere…. “Water, water, everywhere,
And all the boards did shrink;
Water, water, everywhere,
Nor any drop to drink.”
- The Rime of the Ancient Mariner
Samuel Taylor Coleridge
An extended version of Bon Iver’s La Blogotheque Take Away Show of “For Emma, Forever Ago” with three versions of the song and some very startled tourists. I think this is one of my favorite things in the whole world. Not just that the song is so beautiful, and is so beautifully sung, but that [...]
So, This Stephen Malkmus-looking Guy Who Went to High School with My Boss Wrote a Children’s BookA man once said, “Childrens do learn.” and I believe childrens should learn to dream big dreams. Even better is to dream arty dreams like a hipster might draw. This hipster author’s name is Dallas Clayton. Although I do not know for sure that Dallas Clayton is a hipster, he looks like this: And, I [...]
Matilde UrrutiaIt isn’t simply that you are loved gloriously, or loved beautifully. But rather that a pitch perfect expression of love for you sounds and sounds, Rises into the very air. Though the love itself may fade, I do not know, The poetry you inspire ascends, ascending Becomes stars and you, who are so loved, Look [...]
I Left My Heart in Bon Iver“However, this was one of those shows that blows you quite away and I felt privileged to have gotten to witness it.”
//FROM THE ARCHIVES
Bowling“I tried not to think of the large, saggy asses that had sat where I was sitting. I tried not to think of the butt-cracks this chair had seen. “
Concert Etiquette and Ass Inspectors“concert people snuggled warmly under my blanket of hatred include: people who mosh, loud talkers, loud singers, people who throw things and hurt people, men who rub their crotches against your back….”
Confused, Ignorant Bastards and the Federal Government“I realize that there are differing opinions with regard to Marx, and his most famous work, The Communist Manifesto, but I was unaware that we had degenerated in this country to the point that we can no longer appreciate alternative political views.”
RIP Alberto GonzalezBy historical precedents, the Bush administration is probably only approaching a “slightly elevated” level of second-term scandal related resignations. That said, we couldn’t be happier with the folks who’ve been jumping ship lately, insofar as there’s no chance we’ll miss them. Also, like Rove before him, Gonzalez can still look forward to potential prosecution.
What’s the Point?A perspective we should all hope to remember a little more often. Now I’m going to play some golf.
