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Supreme Court Rules: Get Offa My Lawn!
So unless you’ve been living under some sort of judiciary rock, then you know the Supreme Court ruled today 5-4 in favor of overturning the 28-year-old Washington D.C. ban on hand guns. This, of course, is a wonderful day for gun enthusiasts, proud NRA members, and the generally ornery. As for the rest of us, it seems much remains to be seen. While the NRA begins filing law suits all over the country to overturn past judicial rulings which imposed limits on gun rights, it seems worth considering, just from a general common sense perspective, exactly why the court ruled in this manner, and just what it means.
First of all, the Second Amendment was ratified in 1791. Without delving too deeply into the history books, we can, at least, recall that a number of realities of daily life have changed significantly since that time. Most notably, perhaps, the fear amongst individual states that the Federal government would overstep their bounds and violate the basic tenets of Unification. This stark reality was reason enough for Americans to seek and secure the right to own guns in some manner, whether or not you understand the Second Amendment to be referring specifically to a militia or not. Desperate times demand desperate militias.
In 2008, the above seems at least overly romantic, if not downright preposterous to my lily-livered arse. The government has systematically overstepped it’s bounds a legion of times in the intervening 207 years, and yet the only offense ever deemed worthy of revolt was when they tried to put a stop to slavery. Props to the North for having some guns of their own lying around!
Still, since the Civil War ended in 1865, most of us seem to have begun expressing ourselves through political mechanisms or largely peaceful resistance. Though we certainly faced our share of struggle throughout the late 19th, 20th and now 21st centuries, that revolutionary spirit now seems, for the most part, like something from a bygone era.
The difference today is that there are now two types of gun owners: 1) Hunters and enthusiasts who live largely in the south and the west (this also includes bourgeois politicians who are predisposed to accidentally shooting their friends in the face).
2) Criminals.
Everyone who doesn’t fall into the above two categories, which by current estimates amounts to roughly two-thirds of the U.S. population, for some reason fails to arouse the sort of fundraising enthusiasm evident in the National Rifle Association (or even your average criminal defense lobby). The experience for this population at the center is a rather murky one, and it is sadly rather hard to quantify the effect of the American love affair with guns as it relates to them.
Certainly gun deaths affect family members and friends who don’t fall into categories 1 or 2 above. Certainly the facts support the notion that guns make violent encounters more violent and more potentially life threatening. Certainly in neighborhoods where gun violence is prevalent, the climate of fear for non-gun-owning residents is also a very real phenomena, though it is probably one of the toughest realties to quantify. Given this, it’s no surprise that average folks will opt to draw some anecdotal conclusions about the recent Supreme Court decision. My conclusions follow:
1) Washington D.C. is and was a very violent city. 2) Between 1976 and yesterday, it was, at least, safe to assume that anyone carrying a gun in D.C. was a criminal. 3) Many other cities throughout the country have not outlawed handguns, yet they continue to enjoy demoralizing crime rates. In most of these cities, by my last check, the gun-owners, have not mobilized and brought their firearms to the aid of the innocent citizenry in their municipalities. 4) D.C. will now join those cities where it is NOT safe to assume that a person carrying a gun is a criminal. Also, it will be safe to continue assuming that there will not be an armed citizen revolt against criminals in any city. 5) Maybe this all adds up to a net wash, but I think policing gun crimes just got a little more difficult, and it will just get worse.
To sum up, while I would love to pick a fight with the NRA, that is not my intention. In fact, based on my recent NPR listening, it sounds like the guys (yes, only 10% are women) who love their hunting rifles and home protection pistolas, are really not the key problem. Still, while I’m no Antonin Scalia, I find ZERO resemblance between the current pro-gun movement and the early Americans for whom the Second Amendment was written. Instead, the public face of the NRA appears to pursue their agenda with a dogged selfishness which seems to come at the expense of the safety of ALL Americans.
To co-opt a little quote from George W. Bush, I say, if you’re a gun owner who is not part of the solution, then you are either anecdotally or implicitly part of the problem. I say, the Second Amendment addresses the rights of militias, so why the hell aren’t you guys mobilizing your guns and man-power and working for us? I say, as long as your Second Amendment rights are being re-affirmed and expanded, then you owe the rest of us something in return.
You’ve been granted a great victory on this day, so get moving! Get out there and kick some ass with those awesome guns of yours! I’m sure we’ll all feel safer knowing you’re out there.
Either that or I suppose we can dredge up the tired-old argument that a conservative Supreme Court might actually have some dilatory effects on society as we know it.
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Dogs Hear Real Good!
“On really hot or humid days you should have a bottle of water with you in case your dog gets thirsty.”
People, as much as I adore petting your dog in bars, please, please do not bring him or her where loud music and/or humans are present. Try to view a loud, hipster bar from their perspective: dogs have exceptionally good hearing (and olfactory prowess) and the noise probably feels pretty bombastic to them. They cannot cover their floppy ears with their adorable paws. Even if your dog doesn’t have Noise Phobia, if you have to raise your voice to be heard over the music or noise then your dog would probably be happier elsewhere.
I’m not saying you should arrange your life around your dog or neglect your dog by leaving it alone all day and night whilst you frolic. All I am suggesting is going to a quieter bar or going out earlier before it gets loud or maybe just being a little sensitive to your dog’s needs instead of being a selfish, unthinking dick head.
The worst example of this I ever saw was a woman walked her dog into Barcade and two steps in the dog turned around and tried to run out the door. Like, an honest-to-god attempt to make a break for it. And she dragged it inside anyway. Also awful to witness was this woman who brought the cutest, tiniest, snuggliest puppy into Barcade like it was a friggin’ doll. It was pretty loud inside. Both R. and I were aghast.
Unrelated to noise, on really hot or humid days you should have a bottle of water with you in case your dog gets thirsty. One time I saw this woman jog across the Williamsburg bridge with her dog and then turn right around and jog back. It was a hot, humid day and that dog looked pooped and dehydrated. That’s nearly 3 miles under a hot sun, lady! If you want to know how your dog feels, next time wear a sweater while you’re jogging! Barefoot on hot concrete!
I also don’t think people should smoke around pets (or children, obviously), even outdoors. And people shouldn’t swear in front of children, even if they’re going to learn it elsewhere, you should show them it is possible to convey ideas sans obscenities. That last bit doesn’t have to do with dogs, but right now for me they are still kind of the same thing.
ShareModest Mouse Secret Show Tonight at 1 AM in Williamsburg
“Now they suck and don’t play enough older songs….”
Modest Mouse is playing a secret show tonight at 1 AM at Music Hall of Williamsburg, a.k.a. North Six. Doors are at 1 AM and show starts at 1:30 AM.
$20 no-fee tickets are available at Ticketmaster.com
Prior to “We Were Dead….”, I 100% would have gone. But now they suck and don’t play enough older songs to warrant attendance.
However, if they hopped on the “play an album in its entirety” bandwagon and opted to play (my all-time favorite) This Is a Long Drive for Someone with Nothing to Think About, or Lonesome Crowded West, or Building Nothing Out of Something, or even The Moon and Antarctica, I would be in line right now instead of typing this.
ShareHmmm….Um….That’s Weird
Okay. So Clearly I had some very concrete expectations as to how the weather was going to be this morning when I walked outside my house. In short, I expected it would be really, really hot. Like, you know, hellfire kinda hot. I guess I also expected to hear some sort of booming macho voice shouting down from the heavens explaining that you get what you pay for.
Oddly, around 7am there was the usual squirrel fight in my backyard, and now at nearly 10am, I’m hearing quite a few birds chirping, but astoundingly few other signs of the apocalypse. I think I’m gonna wait to post this for a few hours. This could just be the calm before the inevitable storm.
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Uh. Hmm. It’s 2-ish now. That should have been enough time. Did I mention that THESE TWO LADIES GOT MARRIED!?
There’s gotta be a logical explanation. Do you think maybe a certain all-knowing ethereal being upstairs just forgot which day this law went into effect? Maybe tomorrow we’ll be rocking some hellfire? Yeah?
ShareWe’re Ready for the World to End
So as of this writing, the first few gay couples in Los Angeles and San Francisco are counting down the last butterflies-in-the-stomach minutes before they officially tie the knot and start rocking out some marital bliss.
But before the moment of truth, I wanted to go on record with a preemptive ”I told you so” before the sun rises tomorrow and we find ourselves living in a new kind of hell on earth, flush with fire, brimstone, and probably a few folks who have fallen down the slippery slope and opted to marry their house pet instead of a human (thanks for the warning Rick Santorum!).
Of course, if none of that happens tomorrow, then I guess I’ll have some egg on my face. Like if it turns out to be just another day wherein people go to work, bitch about gas prices and the war, then go home with some take-out chinese food to watch a marathon of The Deadliest Catch, then I suppose we’ll all look pretty stupid for complaining so much about gay marriage.
But really, come on. Let’s be realistic. It’s obviously gonna be the fire and brimstone option I’m sure. We’re totally overdue for some of that stuff. Seriously. How could it not end in a hell on earth with all the damnation and the whatnot?
Fingers crossed!
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